Best Michael Scott Quotes
Why do I like Hooters?
"Why do I like Hooters? Well, I will give you two reasons: the boobs and the hot wings."
I consider Oscar a friend
"You don't call retarded people retards. It's bad taste. You call your friends retards when they are acting retarded and I consider Oscar a friend."
I sit on your lap
"I don't sit on your lap because it's comfortable. I sit on your lap, because I like the way your thighs feel on my butt."
Thank you Dateline!
"Yeah, I'm trying to lure these kids into my booth, but kids are very wary about being lured these days. Thank you Dateline!"
My Indian culture seminar was going great
"My Indian culture seminar was going great, until Toby decided that he was too immature to deal with culturally explicit images. It's just sex, people! Everybody does it! I'm doing it with Carol...probably tonight!"
We have a day honoring Martin Luther King
"I don't understand. We have a day honoring Martin Luther King, but he didn't even work here."
And then suddenly...
"You were nothing but great to your hoe and you told her that she was the only hoe for you, that she was better than all the other hoes in the world. And then suddenly...she's not yo' hoe no mo'."